A Guided Tour

... ... ...

... ... ...

... ... ...

Hey, Dissociation Station?... ... ... 

Huh? 

... ... ... Where do you... ... ... go? 

She gestures to the air around her and makes the sound of a desk top shutting down. 

We know exactly what she means.

We've been asked before. 

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It has many names. Depending on who answers. 

Delirium would say The Gutter. The literal space between word, image and text. 

Jack would say The In-between.  

Juno would say The Orray of Worlds at the heart of the Multiverse. But that is so very like them, theatrical ... ... ... meta, conceptual on a grand scale. 

However, no matter its name ... ... ... the first word that comes to mind  ... ... ... home.

Would you like the tour? Come, we'll show you. No. No. It's no trouble.  Not at all. 

There ain't much off limits. 

Just remember, it's look but don't touch. 

Just our little joke there. 

Come on. We'll take the lift. 

Down. Down. Down we go. Down into The Underground Club. 

Hold on tight. Depending on the situation, we can be in here for minutes, hours, even. But often it is merely seco... 

Ah. Here we go. 

Welcome. 

Shall we get you checked in? 

Name? Ha. Only teasing. 

We know who you are. 

But you might not know us all. Not yet any...

LA! 

Oh, aye... here comes trouble. Let's see... ... ... Superman onesie under an oversized pair of black shorts, a black and grey hoodie and a black beanie that covers our eyes... ... ... Talon. 

All right, T?

La! Yeah! 

You heading up? 

La! Is that all right? 

Course it is, lil buddy. Tom's with us on the Surface. 

Yay! Tom! Tom! Tom! We love Tom. 

Go on. Get going. Remember... ... ... stay off the Arkham. 

O...okay. La! Oh, hi... ... ... didn't catch your name. ... ... ... Nice to meet you. Okay, bi bi. La!

There he goes. Little scamp. 

Where were we? Oh yes. Check in. 

Here you go. 

Take this... ... ... a visitor's pass. Put it on when you are ready. There we go. Nice. It suits you. 

Right. On with the tour. 

Follow me. And stay close. You could get lost in here as simply as blinking. 

But don't you worry. You're with me. I know this place like the back of my ... ... ... oh, look at that, that's new. 'Cuse me for a moment. 

Oi, Rouge! 

WHAT?

We've got a new entry hall. When'd this happen? 

HOUR AGO. DON'T LOOK AT ME. I DIDN'T CREATE IT. 

Who did? 

WHO YA THINK? 

Ah, fair enough.  Oh this is ... ... ... you want to say hi?

SURE. ALRIGHT MATE? HOW'S IT GOIN'? DON'T MIND ME HANDS.  JUST BEEN WORKIN ON ME BIKE. 

You don't have a bike. 

IT'S IN THE GARAGE.  

We have a garage?!

OH BOY. YA AIN'T DESCENDED RECENTLY HAVE YA? 

Please tell me the Pool Room is still here. 

YEAH.

Nice. 

THOUGH GIVE THE TABLE A GOOD WIPE DOWN. SOMEONE GAVE TALON DARTH VADOR BUBBLE BATH AND HE SPILT IT ... ... ... WHERE IS THE LITTLE TERROR? 

Upstairs. 

I'LL KILL HIM LATER. RIGHT, SEE YA 'ROUND. 

Sorry about that. Where were we? 

That was Ben Platt and Waving Through A Window here on Underground Radio. It's just turned 15:36 this fine Monday with me, Angel Dust here on TPCP Drive By; Your System-Mic Way To Enjoy Your Day.

If you are just joining us, then welcome. Now we don't know about you, but... ... ... 

Ooh, it's my favourite show. We listen to Scarlet every Monday on the way to pick up the kids from The Puppet Palace. That is where Kitty is now. She's probably with Tawny and the Shadow Mime. 

Talon, you've just met, of course. But have you met Kitty? Young lass, loves cake? An irrepressible bundle of energy hyped up on too much sugar? No? Well... don't say we didn't warn you. 

Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha! 

Typical Kitty. You can hear her before you see her. It's the vocal stim you see. She's got The Giggle of a God of Chaos. 

Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha! 

Ah, and we see she is not alone. The fair Faer Puck is with them too. How goes it, you two? 

Puck is most well. Puck thank Ivy for asking Puck how Puck is doing. 

Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha! Me good too! Me did a painting of a house. It have windows and doors and is in a hill. It was supposed to be on, but in sounded more practical. 

And the Shadow Mime and Tawny? 

Fused... ... ... The Shadow Mime fused the day Crimson and Puck emerged. That's why Puck could not speak right away. 

... ... ... 

You didn't know that? 

... ... No ... ... ... 

Oh ... ... ... Now you know. 

Tawny says hi, though! Tawny is still around. In fact, here he is now ... ... ...  the Terrific Tawny Tyger! 

GRRRR... ... ... GRRRR ... GRR--- Hello! 

But ... but ... Tawny ... Tawny was ... Tawny was a puppet. We don't understand. You were a hand puppet. You were a tiger puppet... ... ... 

Oh? Yeah. That happens sometimes. 

We call it the Bleed. But it happens all the time. I mean Puck is a fic-i-tive after all. It isn't that sup-suprising... ... ... Would you like my drawing to take with you? 

Um... ... ... Okay.

There you go then! Well, I am off for cake! See you later. Come Tyger. Come Puck. Let's get some cake. 

Umm... Let's ... Let's get on with the tour. 

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Finally, we come to the bedrooms. As you can see, each room is denoted with a corresponding emoji. These are how TPCP interact with one another and the world on the Surface. Purple heart for Kitty. Dogo for Talon. Double Helix for GATTACA. Etc. Etc. Etc. 

There are a few other bedrooms in the annexe. Oh, and... ... ... The Tower. The Tower of Morrigu that you ... can totally explore. Ha. You thought I was gonna say forbidden from entering, weren't you? Ha! We may be a cliche but we would like to think we aren't that cliche. Ha! 

Well, would you look at that. Back at the very beginning. Always a perfect place to start, and sometimes not the worst place to end. Depending on who you ask, of course. 

I hope you enjoyed your time with us. If you did, tell your friends. If you didn't ... well, it was free, but please take this complimentary compliment as a way of an apology: It was a pleasure to have you with us. 

So... that's your lot. You've met the gang. Those who have wanted to at any rate. There are others who prefer not to interact or engage with the surface. 

Don't take it to heart. It ain't you. 

Tell you what... Why don't you keep the pass? That way, you will always be a guest at the club. 

Until we meet again. 

Bu-By now.

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.. ... ... Where do you...  go? 

Oh... ... ... nowhere really... ... ..